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  1. Tanith Carey

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    I am a UK parenting author and journalist ('What's my Teenager Thinking?'/'Girls, Uninterrupted' ) who has been writing on the effects of porn for over ten years. Gary was always extremely supportive and generous with his time when I asked for his help - and I hope I helped spread his findings. What a good and brave man he was. A huge loss. His work will live on.

  2. Mary Sharpe

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    Losing Gary is like losing a beloved brother. His depth of knowledge of this important subject and dedication to teaching it, all laced with his ever present humour, made him a joy to work with.

    He listened carefully to men who were reporting unaccounted for sexual dysfunctions and diminished interest in real partners when no one else was making a connection to the now readily available, high speed internet porn. He diligently sought out and dissected the academic literature as it rolled out and inspired users to consider experimenting with quitting porn to release them from the impairments compulsive use of porn was causing them. He combined that theoretical knowledge of porn-induced brain changes with the good news, real life stories of users who had quit porn to produce the life saving TEDx talk in 2012 "The Great Porn Experiment". His remarkable teaching prowess became the inspiration for our education charity, "The Reward Foundation - Love, Sex & the Internet". We wanted to help spread the priceless information mined by Gary that users were not lost and broken, but could free themselves from the treacherous siren calls of Internet porn.

    Gary loved Marnia with a tenderness and devotion that is rare, and he had a similar love for his beloved son Arion. I count myself fortunate to have known him as a friend and colleague for many years. He will be deeply missed. I find some comfort in knowing that his great work will live on to help many others and that we can feel like he is still with is by listening to the many talks, videos and podcasts that he made. Farewell, dear friend and teacher.

    I have been hearing this music in my head since Gary left us. It is called “Sicilienne” by an eighteenth century Austrian woman composer called Theresia von Paradis. I like to think that she has come from paradise to bring Gary home.

  3. Dr Darryl Mead

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    Gary changed the way the world thinks about pornography.

    As the key mind behind the peer-reviewed paper ‘Is Internet Pornography Causing Sexual Dysfunctions? A Review with Clinical Reports’, Gary helped to change the face of pornography research.

    This paper put the term Pornography Induced Erectile Dysfunction (PIED) into the scientific literature. By saying that pornography was potentially harmful Gary and his co-authors, seven US Navy doctors, faced massive resistance from supporters of the pornography industry. Gary bravely resisted every effort to have publication of the paper blocked. His persistence was rewarded. It has now been cited 131 times and is the most widely read paper the journal Behavioural Sciences has ever published.

    Gary’s other huge contribution is the website yourbrainonporn.com. In the past year over 3.6 million people have used it as their trusted source of publicly available information about the harms of pornography. We will help it grow even stronger over the coming months and years.

    What an achievement. I will miss Gary every day.

  4. Anonymous Comment

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    The work of Mr Gary will be remembered and cherished for generations to come. Through his work Mr Gary has saved millions of lives , marriages , dreams & aspirations from jeopardy.

    You will be missed Sir, can't thank you enough for your contribution.

  5. Anonymous Comment

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    Gary's work was essential to understand what I was going through, being a porn consumer since early adolescense.
    Having followed Gary since 2013, right before he published his book, I can tell that he always defended his thesis using evidence and reason, and never flinched when deniers harassed him miserably.
    For that reason, I consider him a true champion of critical thinking and truth-seeking. A pioneer who raised awareness about an emerging problem — despite the backlash he was going to face from the billionaire porn industry — and helped thousands of individuals along the way; his legacy will still help many others all around the world.

    My condolences from Spain. R.I.P.

  6. Jeff Carella

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    Gary was always very kind to my sister Kim & me. My fondest memories with Gary included shooting hoops together when he was in town or blasting The Beach Boys during our visit to Oregon. Gary will be missed dearly!

  7. Lisa L Thompson

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    As devasting as the news of Gary’s passing is to his friends and allies, I can only imagine the pain that his wife Marnia and son Arion must be feeling. I hope that the messages that have been shared here help bring you both comfort as you grieve the loss of a devoted husband and father.

    There can be no doubt of the strength of Gary’s passion, intelligence, warmth, and fortitude. In the years since I got to know him, I’ve had the deepest respect for his work and honestly have been in awe of his encyclopedic knowledge on the harms of pornography. Time and time again, I have relied on his website as “the place” to get the right information. His work has truly empowered a movement and helped set untold numbers of people free from their pornography addictions. He helped and inspired so many of us involved in the fight to end sexual exploitation with his wisdom and wit and by serving as the watchman on the wall. With his passing the world has lost an incredibly special and irreplaceable individual.

  8. Anonymous Comment

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    I m eternally grateful for your work. May you soul rest in peace.

  9. André da Conceição Rigon Bazzo

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    almost a year ago I found out about my porn addiction through Mr. Wilson's ted talk and found out even more when I searched his website, since then I've been talked about and informed about the harms of porn on social media, for sure it was my biggest influence and inspiration for me to have had that attitude. I have no words to thank you for all the work he's done and what it's meant to me. My condolences to family and friends and I will miss him very much.

  10. Gabriel

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    Gary, you are an absolute legend. Thank you for saving my life.

  11. Jennifer Schneider

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    Marnia, I am so sorry for Gary's loss! You and he have been active for so long at SASH. I'm sure he will be missed!
    Jennifer

  12. Felix

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    Gary opened the eyes to my excessive porn and masturbation habit that destroyed my life. My life changed dramatically since I stopped PMO 3 years ago. A man that I never met changed my life to the better. Without his engagement I wouldn't be able to face the difficulties life put in front me since my fathers brain aneurysm popped. I'm able to take care of my family and thus give my family a positive outlook on life. On my very dark days I wouldn't be able to cope with this very difficult life situation. It's not an exaggeration that this man contributed heavily to avoiding my suicide. You never know what the waves of life will do to others. The waves Gary created are positive waves that bring hope, happiness and a lot of potential to future generations.

  13. Matt Dobschuetz

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    Gary's work is a first step for many guys struggling with excessive porn use. His TEDx talk was the first place I saw him. I remember watching it saying, "YES!" It was perfect. He was the right guy at the right time to deliver the message. We are all deeply indebted to him.

  14. Juan

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    Thank you for helping us recover our lifes. Me and many others wouldn´t be where we are without you.

  15. Anonymous Comment

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    Gary gave voice to a struggle I lived with in silence and shame for 20 years. I remember finding YBOP online and thinking "oh my God, this is me". Without the slightest exaggeration, Gary's bravery, tenacity, and commitment to speaking the truth about an uncomfortable subject saved my life.

    And that was before I had ever met him.

    When we finally did meet, I discovered a humble, kind, generous man. Inspired by Gary's example, I had waded into the world of porn addiction advocacy, and before that first meeting, I worried that Gary might see me as an upstart. Those fears melted when we spoke. Gary was warm and encouraging. Together with his amazing wife Marnia, he became an enthusiastic collaborator and a trusted, understanding friend who stood by my side during some of my own most difficult moments.

    I was only vaguely aware of Gary's health struggles, but I had a front-row seat to the relentless, unfounded, unhinged abuse he absorbed almost daily over the internet; undue recompense for speaking his mind about a controversial topic. But I never saw him waver or back down from his mission to gather and disseminate information that he knew would help people find their way out of problem porn use and toward a healthier, more fulfilling life.

    For me, Gary's dogged determination in the face of adversity brought to mind the Wordsworth poem, "The Character of the Happy Warrior" (https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/45512/character-of-the-happy-warrior), and in particular this passage:

    Who is he
    That every man in arms should wish to be?
    [...]
    'Tis he whose law is reason; who depends
    Upon that law as on the best of friends;
    Whence, in a state where men are tempted still
    To evil for a guard against worse ill,
    And what in quality or act is best
    Doth seldom on a right foundation rest,
    He labours good on good to fix, and owes
    To virtue every triumph that he knows:

    Gary met his adversaries with reason, facts, and an abiding, always-good-natured belief in the virtue of sharing knowledge so that truth can prevail. He never backed down from his principles, he tended to his family and friends, he gave his time and energies generously, and he carried the burdens of his fame with humility.

    He was, in other words, the type of person we all should wish to be. Someone (to borrow another passage from the Happy Warrior) "whose high endeavours are an inward light, that makes the path before him always bright".

    Thanks, Gary, for lighting the way for so many of us. We love and miss you.

  16. Anonymous Comment

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    Like many people, Gary's wisdom has had a massive impact on my life that I will never forget. His presentation on "Tedx Talks" will always have a positive effect on me. Never before had there been somebody so courageous to talk about what he did in front of a massive audience, he has my utmost respect for that as his wisdom surely saved me.

    Thank you for everything.

  17. John McWilliams

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    Very sad news about Gary. He inspired so many people.

    RIP Gary

  18. Paula Hall

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    So, so sad to hear this tragic news. Gary has been such an inspiration to me and the team at the Laurel Centre and his work has helped not only the clients we work with and the therapists we train, but thousands, perhaps millions, of others. He has left an amazing legacy and I feel honoured to have known him. My thoughts and prayers are with his family and friends. God bless you Gary and all you have loved.

  19. Don Hilton

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    Over a decade ago I first started speaking and writing about how neuroscience and pornography interface, and quickly became aware of Gary’s work. Over the years, as we have participated in various events related to this subject I came to know him better personally. One enjoyable memory is a conversation we had about the metaphysics and meaning of existence we shared while we were both on adjacent treadmills working out at some conference hotel. There were also many phone conversations over the years which were always valued.

    Gary’s sudden loss is obviously immensely difficult for Marnia, Arion, and those who knew him best, but he leaves a big hole in my heart as well. He was fiercely loyal to his friends and to the movement, and combined that loyalty with tenacity, a keen intellect, and a gifted ability to sift through data and concisely distill out and articulate the essence of the matter at hand. He was simply brilliant, but combined that asset with an indomitable warrior spirit and a desire to lift and help those captivated by exploitation.

    As a loss to the movement he is simply irreplaceable. While it will be impossible to replicate who he is and what he has done, he has set a standard for those of us who remain to fight. His message of never backing down before the bullies of exploitation, and of answering lies with truth is a timeless one, and we will honor Gary by continuing this fight with renewed determination and vigor.

    Don Hilton

  20. Anonymous Comment

    May. 23rd, 2021 Permalink

    I came across his famous ted talk about the great porn experiment. This may very well have initiated my process of recovery from porn addiction.

    Thank you Gary for your clear and calm message, it has improved countless lives, including my own.

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